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Cotton Marriage

Why Cotton marriage?

Cotton is soft and warm, it actually symbolises the cotton marriage becoming more and more comfortable for the new couple. From the fragile paper relationship adapted to the changes and stay stronger and stronger. Looking back to the fresh year, curious and excitement really helped a lot in the relationship.

Independency Vs Loneliness

I have watched so much western drama before I came to England. Inspired by Desperate Housewives, I thought marriage life in western world is taking care of children and chatting with friends. However, marriage life is all sort of non-stop work, laundry, dusting, cooking etc. I started to get used of the unlimited housework, and I tried my best to minimise my housework. My parents visited me this year and brought me a cleaning robot. It is one of the best invention of the world, it helps me maintain the cleanness of our house. Now, I am looking for toilet brushing robot. lol

As for me, working out for money and working in for our home are both essential. To support myself, I have to be financially independent. I found a job and this job kind of speed up getting my driving license. I enjoy staying at home and watching soap, on the other hand, I believe I have to practise my brain sometimes to keep it working. Furthermore, earning money is one of my biggest hobby. Therefore, I work 5 days in a week, and I spend more than 2 hours on the transportation every working day.

Sometimes I do feel tired that after long day working and long way driving, I have to cook when I arrive home. On my precious two days off, there must be one or two days for doing housework. I am glad that my husband finally realise this problem and making something for me to eat when I am back. Team work is a must in a relationship, only a person’s effort and hard work will not last forever.

My husband’s job requires him to travel a lot, most of time I am alone. I never like this feeling, that you move for a beloved one and he is still away. I argue a lot for this situation, because it is not fair to me while it’s the fact that we cannot change or do anything. I don’t like the feeling that thing is out of control neither.

The difference

In China, the original family plays a significant role in a marriage. Chinese parents will help or even control things between the new couple, and of course, because Chinese parents give huge financial support for new couple to build the new family. My husband’s family won’t involve our relationship, it smooths our relationship.

The curiosity and fresh in the honeymoon period was fading, however, there are too much difference to be assimilated. For instance, when I read something funny, I tried to translate and share with my husband, that won’t be funny any more. So we can hardly laugh at the same joke.  As to food, if you have ever watched “A bite of China”, then you might understand me as a Chinese. I love all the Chinese food, and I miss them very much, but for my western husband, his favourite food is PIZZA while that’s same as bread with sauce for me.

I really wish my husband will know and admire Chinese culture and food, so we can understand each other a bit more.

Have a baby or not?

Is it time to have a baby? Should we have a baby? My friends at my age all have children for one or two, sometimes I feel like it’s time for me to have a baby. But do I really want a baby? Am I suitable for taking care of a baby? Likewise, do I need a Hermès birkin just because someone has? Every time we talk about the baby topic, we don’t have a conclusion, thanks to my husband, he respects my choice. My plan is to retire early and relocate to Thailand. Having a baby will slow me down, at this moment, I just wanna be a selfish me.

Suitable for myself is always the best option, it might not be the best in the world, but only me know how comfortable it is for me. Cotton marriage is the period that you find yourself more comfortable in the relationship, also look for a suitable way to develop the relationship.

To memorize my cotton marriage, august 2017.

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